fight

went for mip.

people could sense i'm down.

jackson said ladies want the man to fight for them and in the same way man also want ladies to fight for them. fight meaning going through difficult times for them and with them. i guess it's true. only when u fight for something u know the value of something in ur heart.

he says dun look back once a decision has been made. u will look back years later to see why it turned out that way.

i know this. i didn't look back for SLOW. and i also am thankful we didn't continue.

but to live through it all over again 5 years later is difficult and i'm not feeling good.

why? why? why? so many questions and no answers.

want

asked pa whether on hindsight he would've still wanted a family given that he had the business to run.

he said u have to want it.

if u want something, all inconveniences, all hurdles will be challenges and not burdens.

spoken like a man.

he also said people can't be alone. it's very lonely and people can't live like that. indeed when we are young we think investments in personal and intimate relationships a waste of time.

yes they would be - if our 1 life goal is to grow old and lonely all alone.

i wanna do something meaningful

been a couple of months since i got back and i've yet to find something meaningful. i have been watching those ted videos that tw's been uploading and gone to their website.

it looks interesting and more importantly it feels like they are full of passion and inspiration.

much different from the unethical environment i'm used to where excesses are the norm and where the quick and dirty way is always preferred. i hated that and in part that was the reason i left. i just want no part of that.

i really wanna do something meaningful, work for a worthy cause. do something for society.

where shall i start?

misunderstood

i dun live for the moment.

i just cherish the moment.

if that bit of honesty could convey how i really feel about u, then i have no regrets.

even if that was the end.

~inspiration is like the birth of a baby, it doesn't choose a seeming hour to enter the world~ quote from the dreamers

same goes for love.